Friday, March 11, 2011

8-Bit Ballads - Light is Right

If there's one thing that I think that this world is missing, it's a personal dragon for every man, woman and child. Flying and ravaging peasants is a basic human right, and I bring this up so that I can be part of the solution.

If there's a second thing that I think the world is missing, it's poetry based on video games. It's in THIS realm that I think I can leave my greatest contribution to the world, and thusly, The 8-Bit Variety Show presents, "8-Bit Ballads."

My first poem makes insidious inferences about a well-known gaming icon, and is also about one of my favorite franchises, MegaMan.

I hope you enjoy the poem. Either way, SOMEONE has to class up this place...

You're welcome, Internet.


8-Bit Ballads - #1
Light is Right

"Do we have to name her "Roll?" It sounds so ethnic."
When I was asked to fight the 'bots'
I must admit, I sat and thought.
"Why me?" I said to Dr. Light
"Why must I be the one to fight?
These things outside are robots, too,
and they are just like me... not you."

For the first time since I was made,
I saw the Dr.'s words delayed.
I waited, quiet, for his reply.
Our faces locked with eye-to-eye,
he strove some time my gaze to keep,
then shoulders slumped, began to weep.
"What troubles you, dear Dr. Light?!"
I asked as I beheld this sight.
"You are strong, and kind." I said.
" I know you wouldn't want me dead!"
His crying slowed, his shoulders heaved,
his head turned, and he looked relieved.

My creator spoke with care and poise,
 and from his lips, the softest noise
began to issue in reply
and as it did, he caught my eye.

"My dearest son, my pride and joy,
I wouldn't hurt my strong, blue boy.
But all those bots who live down there
and trash things up, I do declare,
are bringing down the neighborhood,
and real-estate values are not good.
 If I ever want to sell this lab,
and move somewhere that's not so drab,
we must clear out that Wily guy,
and crush his castle in the sky.
Blast low-class robots!" He beseeched,
and we'll retire to the beach!"

"And this is why I know that brown robots are conniving.
It's in their programming!"
My eyes were wide, my mouth hung slack.
I wanted now to just turn back.
Was he a bigot all this time
when he told me, "We're stopping crime"?
Thinking back on times long past,
the evidence was there, amassed.
It didn't matter where we were,
he liked to yell those robot slurs.
And he has never shown a knack
for painting any robots black.

It was that day that Dr. Light,
my maker and the world's "White Knight",
told me of his thoughts so base,
and showed me all he saw was race.
So there it is, my sordid story,
and why I never sought for glory.


  1. Awesome work! While I have never played a MegaMan game from start to finish, my best friend growing up really enjoyed the games.

    Anywho, I hope this feature sticks around!

  2. @Coffee

    Thanks, man! Glad you enjoyed it! I was hoping to write a little poetry that had a few laughs in it.

    You should give a try to some of the older MegaMan games, but I warn you... They can be punishing! Possibly even DKCR-level punishing...

  3. "You should give a try to some of the older MegaMan games, but I warn you... They can be punishing! Possibly even DKCR-level punishing..."

    You know, I would probably love the MegaMan games...for some reason I find games that are really challenging(or can be) and enjoy them.

    Ninja Gaiden on the Xbox, I remembered hearing so much about the game being way to difficult, but I enjoyed it.

    I randomly decided to try Call of Duty: World at War on Veteran Difficulty one day...and ended up playing through the entire game that way...GRENADES thrown like crazy by the enemy AI!

    Rage of the Gladiator on the WiiWare service is a Punch-Out style game, and I played that game until I got the highest Rank in each match...

    So, perhaps I should find a MegaMan game and actually give it a try...but it will have to be after I finish(or fail) my New Year's resolution.


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